To judge someone has been considered a pejorative act since biblical times; we have all heard the saying, Judge not, lest ye be judged.
Judgment is considered a bad thing because the object of that judgment is often offended or hurt.
If obese Aunt Hilda wears a short, low cut, brightly colored dress to church Joe, the usher, might judge her and say, For God's sake old woman, tone it down will you? Nobody wants to look at your ugly bod.
We might consider that such a dress is inappropriate and might offend the sensibilities of others; just as, say, we would expect people at a church service to remain quiet and attentive; for someone to get up and begin swearing would be unsuitable behavior.
Judgment stems from the comparison of actions with regard to an agreed upon code of conduct. That code of conduct is different in different cultures of course, so it is really impossible to say that any conduct is right or wrong from a universal standpoint.
For example, one might say that to take another's life is a universal wrong; yet, in a culture of warriors, such may be considered a badge of honor. To die well, to count coup over an enemy's body, were all highly regarded principles in some of our own native American cultures, demonstrating the idea that free will choices determine the appropriateness of any action.
Let's take a look at the statement, Judge not, lest ye be judged.
It has been interpreted to mean, If you say nasty things about someone, they'll probably say nasty things about you. But there is, I think, a deeper meaning behind it.
What happens when Joe judges Hilda?
Mainly, Joe first has to look inside himself and find something negative.
Obese people are ugly and shouldnt advertise themselves, perhaps, is Joes thought. This thought generates negative emotion because he have decided, appropriately or not, that he don't like obesity.
Why would Aunt Hilda be hurt or offended by Joes statement?
Because she looks inside herself and finds something negative. More accurately, Aunt Hilda, in the present moment, decides that there is something inappropriate about herself.
But why would she do this?
When Hilda got up on Sunday morning she felt awfully good; the sun was shining, she had a good rest, she was looking forward to the church dinner and talking with her friends and, as a special treat, she was going to have a talk with that nice pastor who was thinking of displaying some of her art work in the church foyer.
So that morning, Hilda was feeling expansive and joyful; she gazed in her closet and saw the bright yellow print dress she'd been longing to wear since the cold gray day last winter when it caught her eye in the clothing store. Oh, why not! she says. Let's put it on today and shine our light out into the world!
When Joe, the surly usher, makes his judgmental comment as Hilda walks into the church surrounded by her fellow parishioners, he thinks he is making a statement about Hilda, but in fact he is making a statement only about the state of his own consciousness. Joe's comment is merely a reflection of his point of awareness and has little or nothing to do with Hilda!
How can this be? Isn't it obvious that Hilda is wearing a dress that could be considered by many to be in bad taste?
Well, let's look at it from Hilda's point of view!
As she walks past Joe just outside the church doors, Hilda is feeling wonderful about herself. For the first time in a long time she is walking comfortably and she loves the feel and look of the dress. When Joe makes his insensitive remark, Hilda has two choices: (1) to continue in a state of connection with herself, or (2) to decide that Joe's statement is hurtful.
There is NO reason whatsoever for Hilda to do (2), except that the meme When someone says something mean to you, you have to react in kind is powerfully established within the consciousness of all present. Therefore, the expected behavior is: Hilda flushes, becomes sad and cries; or perhaps, Hilda gets angry and whacks Joe over the head with her cherry wood walking stick.
This expectation creates a powerful vibration within the space of consciousness of all present. Hilda is immersed in that space and, along with Joe, is in fact the center of attention for a split second as all await to see how Hilda will react. All understand implicitly, even if not consciously, that the Law of Free Will and the Law of Vibration are in effect; all present understand that Hilda has complete control over her response, for only Hilda can make the decision within herself whether to respond as in (1) or (2).
The Law Of Attraction is the next to come into play, for whatever is Hilda's decision will determine the responses to her, from those around her.
Let's say Hilda does the expected: she caves in, begins to cry and drops her cherished walking stick to the ground. Now all in the vicinity respond according to the vibration which Hilda had brought forth: some angrily criticize Joe, others put their arms around Hilda, comforting her, some angrily go to the pastor and demand the removal of such an insensitive usher; the responses will be varied because the Law of Free Will is always in effect.
The point is, the responses of the others to Hilda are entirely generated from Hilda's free will decisions, not Joe's!
This may seem absurd until we think about what happens if Hilda does (1) instead of (2).
Joe says: For God's sake old woman, tone it down will you? Nobody wants to look at your ugly bod.
Hilda, feeling wonderful about herself, smiles and says cheerfully, That's OK Joe, you probably didn't get your coffee this morning, and without a backward glance, seats herself in her accustomed pew.
What are the responses of the others in this case?
Irritation at Joe, perhaps even downright hostility; but toward Hilda, people smile, chuckle to themselves and say, My, Hilda is in a good mood this morning!
The others respond in this way because they were poised vibrationally upon a teeter-totter, and Hilda's vibrational signal, thrown into the mix, determines whether it swings one way or the other, with regard to Hilda.
It is possible that the tone level of the group will be largely undisturbed by Joe's comment, for Hilda has reminded everyone how grouchy Joe is early in the morning when he doesn't have at least 2 cups of coffee in him, and all understand that on Sunday mornings Joe's wife, encouraging him to better himself, browbeats him to volunteer at the church.
Hilda's attitude and her insightful understanding of Joe's situation not only promote a cheerful vibrational outcome for her, but may also prompt some of the group entering the church to even feel a little sympathy for Joe.
Of course, the exact outcome of the response to Joe will be determined by the precise content of Joe's vibrational offering to the group, but Hilda's cheerful response may bring Joe up the emotional tone scale to the point where the group's response to him is positive as well and everyone simply laughs the whole thing off. In other words, Hilda gets to determine not only the outcome for her, but may also effect a positive outcome for all in the group! This is the power of consciousness, aligned with the laws of the universe to bring about positive change in the world. And all from a simple, conscious decision to stay centered in her own power!
A judgment is really a statement of the attitude of the speaker, it has little to do with the person spoken to.
The statement Judge not, lest ye be judged, really means, Judge not, lest ye influence yourself to feel precisely as you have intended the object of your judgment.
All action follows thought. Thought precedes action. The negative feeling of judgment must always exist within you first, before it is projected to the world at large. This is a rather obvious statement, somewhat like saying, You have to turn the water on before it comes out of the faucet.
However, our little example again reminds us that we have complete control over the way we feel about ourselves; it reminds us of our own power and how we often give it unnecessarily away to others.
Negative judgment may or may not hurt another, but it will always hurt you!