There has always been something holding me back, and I have never been able to figure out what it was. Ive had dozens of hours of therapy, taken lots of selfimprovement courses and seminars, and read lots of books. Ive reached states of bliss, but I always came down from them. You might say, Well of course, silly, you are living on planet earth in the middle of duality. No one is going to feel perfect all the time.
That may be, but you might also recognize the above statement for what it is: a selflimiting belief. I began to look at myself, and the things I thought about, much more mindfully. And I discovered that I was consciously engaging in a process of selfsabotage. I call it the Drama Engine.
A Drama Engine, in a nutshell, goes like this: something in my life isnt going the way I like. Or, there is a potential for something in my life not to go well. Or, I am still upset about and incident that occurred in the past, but which I didnt handle very well.
For example: my business hit a lull and I wasnt making the income I once was. There are expenses coming up at the end of the month and Im wondering how its all going to work out. All of a sudden I find myself creating a worst case scenario, and feeling rotten. In this imagined sequence of events, I have to struggle and fight the universe, but I eventually come out on top. But sometimes I dont, and Im not feeling too good afterwards.
Heres another example: My next door neighbor mentioned cutting down the trees that border my house from his. I really dont want these trees cut down, but this guy works with heavy machinery and has access to all sorts of tree cutting equipment. I imagine myself coming home from work one day and seeing one of the trees lying on top of my new addition, crushing it. Then my drama engine really kicks in and I get to go over there and beat the crap out of the guy. Or sue him for a million dollars. Whatever happens, I am the big hero.
I sometimes participate in an internet board devoted to baseball. One day after I posted, somebody wrote a sarcastic comment about my post. My Drama Engine kicked in and I wrote back, but it wasnt very good, and I got another demeaning post about THAT. I realized how futile it was to keep responding, so I just dropped it. However, my Drama Engine didnt want to let it go and for hours afterwards, I obsessed about it. I imagined writing this guy and telling him that wed meet someplace and talk it over, and if he didnt like it Id kick his butt. THEN Id show him whos right! Again, Im the big hero.
You get the idea. Im sure weve all done this.
The big question is, what is a Drama Engine? Is there a way to transcend it?
A Drama Engine is something consciously generated. It is always under your control. It might appear as if these stray thoughts come from your subconscious mind, and are under the control somehow of your subconscious. But theyre not. Regardless of where the original thought came from, YOU have to make the conscious decision to set up the multipole system. You have to create the antagonist(s) and then consciously use your imagination to run through the scenario.
How do you defeat a Drama Engine? Its not that difficult when you recognize that you are creating the whole thing. Once a Drama Engine gets started, it can seem like its out of your control. It keeps getting bigger and bigger, and you can get yourself emotionally worked up. However, if you understand that an energy flow needs a minimum of two poles, and that you are one of the poles, you can collapse the Drama Engine very quickly to an isolated, one pole system. Without someplace to go, energy cannot flow! If you dont believe that, mentally try to flow energy to something that isnt there. You cant do it!
A Drama Engine requires a minimum of two poles, with you as one of the poles. Therefore, you have complete control over it.
Doing this requires a little mindful attention. I can recognize when Im in the middle of a Drama Engine by my position on the scale of emotion/vibration. In life Im usually on the positive end but when I find myself in the negative range, its almost always because Ive got some kind of Drama Engine activated.
Once you consciously recognize a drama engine and defeat it, youll be amazed at how much better you feel. Like most things in life, when something that was mysterious is explained, it loses its power. The Drama Engine then becomes a phantom, easily deactivated.
Its possible to create a miracle from this process, and completely change how you feel about someone. This will also change the actual relationship in the physical universe. Remember that it takes two to argue or become upset. When you change the character of your energy toward someone from negative to positive, they may very well respond in kind.
And youll feel a whole lot better!