Im a big fan of Esther Hicks, who talks a lot about vibrational matching. But what does that really mean? If it were possible to match vibrations with wealth, for instance, then why arent more people wealthy? If it really was possible to vibrationally match with a great relationship, then why do so many people have relationship issues?
The answer is twofold.
First you have to identify what it is that you want to match up with. Then you have to actually resonate to it. Theres a world of wisdom and growth in both of these steps.
Lets say Barb wants a great relationship but has never been able to find that special guy. What does she do? Well, she could go see a therapist and try to figure out whats wrong. Such an approach might focus on Why are men such idiots? or it may go along the lines of Whats wrong with me? This is called working on your issues. But that doesnt work because all the while Barb is delving into those issues, her vibration is matched up to no relationship. Therapy only works when you can get OFF the subject of whats wrong and onto the creation of a positive future.
But Barb knows that doesnt work for her. Every time I think of meeting someone, it just puts me in a dither. Thats a common difficulty. Very often the thing you want most is the thing that bothers you the most! In that case, before Barb can start on relationships, she needs to get off the subject for a while, and on to something that she can feel good about.
What good is that going to do? Barb asks. Ive got a great job, a nice family and I love my house, but I want someone to share my life with.
Vibrational matching is more about achieving a feeling of happiness and well being than it is about working at something. In other words, its better to be happy about something that has nothing to do with your issues than to beat your head against the wall on something you feel hopeless about.
But how can Barb eventually match vibrations with a great relationship? First she has to get herself feeling good about something. You cant match vibrations with something positive if you feel rotten! When you feel good in general, you set yourself up to attract good things. You might not get a good relationship, but itll be something pleasant that will emphasize your positive vibrational orientation.
After she begins to feel a little better, then Barb can go to work on relationships. First she has to concretely identify what a great relationship means to her.
When we ask her, Barb looks at us like were crazy. I want true love! she says.
Yes, but what does true love mean to you? we ask.
Well, someone who understands me and then she laughs. I was going to say, Someone who understands me and will do what I want, but that seems kind of unworkable. Then she laughs again. After all, we ARE talking about men!
Barb has now taken an important step forward. Usually when something is wanted very badly and its not happening, there are selflimiting beliefs getting in the way. The difference in this approach is that were coming at it from a positive, createwhatyouwant orientation, instead of a findoutwhatswrong viewpoint. You will find that when you appeoach a situation positively, your issues will come up naturally, because your self-limiting beliefs are whast is blocking the positive attainment of your goal. The important difference is that even when you are focusing on the negative belief ot emotion, your fundamental orientation is on the positive goal. Of course, if there is emotional or psychic trauma, that will have to be handled first -- but this is a separate issue.
If we continued to ask Barb What does true love mean to you? she is going to have to think really hard about it. However, all of her thoughts are now lined up to true love instead of her difficulties with relationships. When your thoughts line up with something you want, you begin to resonate to it. When you begin to align your energy to what you want, you start becoming a vibrational match to it. Then you allow the law of vibration and the law of attraction to work for you, instead of against you. Remember, the universe is your obedient servant. It is only too happy to give you exactly what youre focused on!
The trick to applying the law of attraction is that it gives you what you are currently vibrationally matched to, not what you say you want! For years Barb has been frustrated on relationship issues, until it has filled her vibrational view screen. Whenever she thinks about it, she immediately connects up with crummy feelings of frustration. Thats because she has continually activated that vibe through her attention to the negative aspect of the subject.
Consider the idea that thought itself is a vibration. If you can get the idea that your thoughts act as a sort of broadcasting tower to the universe, you can see that the more attention you give to anything, the more powerful will be your signal. The only way to dampen that unwanted signal is to get off of it! The physics of vibration tells us that a vibration does not recede immediately. When you hit a note on the piano, for example, the sound of it can linger for quite a long time, especially when you have the pedal depressed. Inside the piano, the pedal keeps the string vibrating, maintaining the vibration of that note. Thats what happens when you already have a strong set of activated beliefs on something. Your beliefs act like a piano pedal, keeping your thoughts and feelings in the same place! Like a wellestablished neural pathway, you become sensitized and grooved in to a particular way of thinking and feeling.
Whenever Barb thinks about relationships, therefore, her tendency is to immediately and strongly feel the wrong way about them! This is a perfectly natural phenomenon. Some people explain it as karma. Barbs friend Kathy tells her that she probably has bad karma from a previous lifetime. Although this explanation may be comforting to Barb, it really doesnt help her with her difficulty. Karma can be explained very simply using the law of vibration. In an attractionbased universe, you always experience what youre resonating to!
Theres nothing you can do about karma, but there IS something you can do about your own vibe! You are always in control of your own vibrational signal.
If you want positive change you have to change positively. That means getting a firm idea of what it is you want. You have to work on this until you can state your desire in one sentence, AND feel good about it! Along the way youll probably butt up against all kinds of mental garbage. The key is to ignore the trash and keep your focus on your positive desire. Doing so deactivates the unwanted vibration by activating the wanted one.
Unfortunately, its impossible to get rid of something, because as soon as you bring your attention to it, you begin to resonate to it. Try not to think of a blue pig!
If Barb keeps asking herself questions like What does true love mean to me? and What do I want in a relationship? she will eventually reach the point of feeling absolutely wonderful about relationships. And when that happens, she becomes a powerful magnet for exactly that.
(Weve used Barb in this example, but of course the same thing applies to men. In a vibrational universe, gender is utterly irrelevant).